The Water Fountain Parade

Lately, my training partner and I have been hitting the gym at odd hours. Normally we're all about 11 am - but these past few weeks have seen us there at noon, 1 pm, and even 5. It's amazing to me how different the vibe is depending on when you wind up walking through the doors!

We love our mornings. The guy who works the front desk is wonderful to us, and the manager on duty has gone above and beyond in catering to our bizarre requests. Aside from the Tuesday and Thursday morning circuit class (very CrossFit-esque), the gym is quiet. Familiar faces, all busy doing their own thing. We can set up and blow through our workout with little to no interruption or aggravation. It's truly heavenly.

And then there's the afternoon - busier. A bit rowdier. Lots of trainers on the floor, equipment being utilized, mirror space occupied. Until we find our groove, we're a bit testy. There is a bit of growling going on under our breath, a few rolled eyes, plenty of sighing.

Early evening is all about jeans. Jeans. MEN WEARING JEANS and doing bicep curls. Doing squats that have less range of motion than my grandmother getting up and down from her chair. Overhead presses that look more like "raising the roof" than a weightlifting movement.

But the worst part, the absolute worst is that the two squat racks are along the pathway to the water fountain. And it seems that men who wear jeans to workout must be thirstier than others, because they're always walking back and forth and back and forth. They manage, somehow, to time all their travels to coincide when I've just stepped back from the stands with the weight racked. And I know that I'm on the little side, but they have to be able to see me - right? I mean there I am, in all my 4'11 1/2" glory, barbell and bumper plates precariously balanced, moving up and down and they just saunter on by behind me. Squeezing past to congregate at the the water fountain.

And then they make the return trip.

I swear, it can make training 5 x 5 take HOURS.

So consider this a PSA to all you dungaree wearing, roof raising, granny squatting gym boys out there:

Wait a f'ing minute until the person moving heavy weights is finished.

And now for a word from our sponsors:


  1. Staci-- I loved the water-fountain jeans-boys-curls-in-squat-rack piece. Seriously, I am laughing at my desk. Then I read your prior post. Congrads on the deadhang! But... did you happen to notice what you were wearing? Does this mean you too are going to start doing curls in the squat rack and take 50 trips to the water fountain?

  2. lol, if you're going to repost, then so am I :)

    I actually realized that on my way into work this morning. But there were extenuating circumstances - I wasn't actually at the gym to workout. I was there just meeting Gillian for coffee :) So I get a free pass on this one ;)

  3. Sorry for the re-post. My work computer does strange things sometimes.

    Free pass!?!?!? Ugh. This is how it all starts. Next thing we know you'll be preaching the values of the leg press and calf raises. -- dan def crossfitnyc

  4. I've seen people jogging in jeans. Really bizarre.

  5. That is just asking for chafe.

  6. I'm pretty sure Chuck Norris turned my daughter down for Girl Scout cookies about a year ago, outside an Albertson's. I only WISH he'd been wearing jeans. He was wearing very tiny bike shorts, appropriate for CrossFit perhaps.

    Maybe not those jeans, though.

    Dirt again!


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